Ba careful what you wish for!

Be careful what you wish for. It might just come true!

So goes the old saying, and like most old sayings, has is a lot of truth behind it.

I live in the city but have a need to escape it fairly on a fairly regular basis. Which usually happens on impulse. I decide to go (these days admittedly it requires slightly more careful planning around commitments and constraints), see what options are available and suitable, and go. And I am always amazed at the comments from people about how "lucky" I am to "just do it". Yes, I agree, the fact that I do not have small children (in my case, none at all) makes it easier, but I have other constraints.  For example, I do not have a steady income, so if I do go, I have to weigh that up against loss of income (no paid leave for me!). And the kids can go along too, or stay with grandma or leave them behind with Dad (or Mom) if you want. Or go for a shorter period. Whatever! Come to think of it, the people who comment most about "lucky", are the ones who actually have no "excuse" (for lack of a better word). They are usually also the ones who are financially in a WAY better position than I am to go, if they so wish.

And "excuse" is probably the right word. I suspect - and I know not to make assumptions - but I do have this nagging suspicion that most (okay, many) people who voice their envy do not really want to go. Let's just stay with the example of a few days' break (as this may apply to many scenarios) - it involves work! You still have to pack a few items of clothing, travel, sleep in different surrounds, etc. etc. - at the very least. You can take everything and the kitchen sink or you can pack only a toothbrush and clean undies, but you still have to do something. And it may involve risk. The weather might be foul, you might miss your team's game, you might lose out on a good party "back home", traffic, the bedding may not be as nice as yours. It is much easier to have an excuse (work, money, kids, partner....).

My point is, we are rarely "lucky". It always is about choices and options. I have the utmost respect for someone who really longs to do something but simply are not able to, but rarely do you hear these people complain or voice their envy.

The freedom to "just do it" involves a lot of responsibility. If you do it, it is your choice. No-one or nothing to blame.

So next time you say you wish you could do something, think carefully about what's stopping you. And if nothing is, think carefully whether you really wish for it. Because it may just come true!

Love and light,

Celeste

Little voice

Which voice do I listen to?

(Part 1)

Our inner being has an amazing way of telling the truth. That knowing within us. We can put up a facade and ignore it, but that little voice will keep popping up. However, most of people don't recognize it or simply do not hear it. It is drowned by the sounds of the outer life which demands our attention. But hereon lies the paradox. For if we don't adhere to our true selves (the little voice I'm talking about), the outer world can not get our rightful attention. Our best. Moreover, the little voice is also drowned by the sound of that outer, evil, negative voice that sits on our shoulders and pretends to be us. That voice which leads us astray, tells us we are not good enough, it can't be done, and a host of other untruths.

So how do we tell the difference between these two voices and how do we know which voice to listen to?

I'll address it in stages...

Firstly, you need to be able HEAR the inner (good) voice - your Self.

Sometimes it takes years of undoing the things that drowned that little voice. So we need to learn to reconnect with ourselves and our inner beings. To be still, empty and spacious, and to really listen. We can do that through meditation, breathing practices, journalling, connecting with nature, retreats, teachers and gurus, and other practices. These are all excellent practices that support it, but we need to also understand what suits of us individually. Each of us is different, and whilst practices help and can make a huge difference, it is still up to the individual to apply what resonates with them and to adapt it to suit them. And to sustain it.

A Coach can do wonders to guide us with spiritual and inner transformation practices. People sometimes spend years searching...trying many different things, and although the search for Self, growth or transformation is a personal one, and the only way to it is through it, guidance is a gift some people are willing to give, so why not take it?! A Coach can help us explore what really drives us, help identify the clutter in our heads so we can be more authentic and better able to understand that little voice, and support us through implementing and sustaining good practices to make it "stick".

Take a moment to reflect on this and be honest with yourself. Can you hear that little voice? Do you recognize it? And do you listen to it and stay true to it? Or do you boast about "your gut always being right" without really understanding it?

Next up... Part Two.

Love and light,
Celeste

Which voice do I listen to?

(Part 1)

Our inner being has an amazing way of telling the truth. That knowing within us. We can put up a facade and ignore it, but that little voice will keep popping up. However, most of people don't recognize it or simply do not hear it. It is drowned by the sounds of the outer life which demands our attention. But hereon lies the paradox. For if we don't adhere to our true selves (the little voice I'm talking about), the outer world can not get our rightful attention. Our best. Moreover, the little voice is also drowned by the sound of that outer, evil, negative voice that sits on our shoulders and pretends to be us. That voice which leads us astray, tells us we are not good enough, it can't be done, and a host of other untruths.

So how do we tell the difference between these two voices and how do we know which voice to listen to?

I'll address it in stages...

Firstly, you need to be able HEAR the inner (good) voice - your Self.

Sometimes it takes years of undoing the things that drowned that little voice. So we need to learn to reconnect with ourselves and our inner beings. To be still, empty and spacious, and to really listen. We can do that through meditation, breathing practices, journalling, connecting with nature, retreats, teachers and gurus, and other practices. These are all excellent practices that support it, but we need to also understand what suits of us individually. Each of us is different, and whilst practices help and can make a huge difference, it is still up to the individual to apply what resonates with them and to adapt it to suit them. And to sustain it.

A Coach can do wonders to guide us with spiritual and inner transformation practices. People sometimes spend years searching...trying many different things, and although the search for Self, growth or transformation is a personal one, and the only way to it is through it, guidance is a gift some people are willing to give, so why not take it?! A Coach can help us explore what really drives us, help identify the clutter in our heads so we can be more authentic and better able to understand that little voice, and support us through implementing and sustaining good practices to make it "stick".

Take a moment to reflect on this and be honest with yourself. Can you hear that little voice? Do you recognize it? And do you listen to it and stay true to it? Or do you boast about "your gut always being right" without really understanding it?

Next up... Part Two.

Love and light,
Celeste

Little teacher lady

I see her on Sundays. The little lady selling the Sunday paper on the corner of an intersection near where I live. She exuberantly waves at everybody driving or walking past. I have never seen her without a smile - one of those smiles you can see from a distance away and that brightens your day.

Of course I smile and wave back. I don't think many would be able to resist smiling and waving back.

She is modestly dressed in slacks and the T-shirt from the paper for promotion, but never shabby. Her hair is clean and neatly trimmed, and although old age has started showing a slight stoop, she holds herself well. She does not look tired or sad, does not invoke pity.  She is proud and not ashamed. And she shares it with all.

I don't care about the Sunday paper. But I will buy from her - as I'm not buying the paper, but I'm receiving her joy and her presence. Buy the paper, as she does not need my charity in the form of donations. She provides it. The paper is the symbol for what I'm getting from her. The learnings.

She is a teacher. We learn from masters, universities, books, accredited forums, the internet and plenty other sources. Wonderful sources. But we sometimes overlook the best teachers. The ones who show us real, simple life; who teach us to have a simple grateful, joyous attitude, despite obvious financial and probably other difficulties. She teaches how to give and to enrich and to heal.

I think that is real happiness.

Love and light.

Celeste x

Kisk ass in style

Trawling through social media and blogs today, I became aware of the theme I'm picking up on today. Our awareness goes what we focus on, and for a few days I have been pondering the notion of fitting in, or conforming to the expectations of society (or not!). So the thread I'm noticing today is one of don't ask for permission, just go out there and do it.

Actually that is not true. I have not only thought of "fitting in" for the last few days. I have been thinking that my whole life. As long as I can remember, my biggest desire was to fit in, to be accepted, to be one of "them". To blend in and to disappear. To lose or not develop my individuality. These last descriptions only dawned upon me once I finally gave up the struggle (and it was a struggle!) to fit in. Oh, of course I respect boundaries and have a very healthy sense of what is appropriate (behaviour, dress, language etc.) in any given situation, or rather, most of the time <chuckle>.

So I'm wondering how many of us sometimes feel a bit restricted by what society expects of us. Or actually, our perception of what society expects of us. We constantly worry what others think of us. And I guess we all know "others" (society, they) don't give a hoot really. Because "they" are too worried about what others think of them. But still we keep that safety blanket over us and for some of us that blanket becomes h-e-a-v-y.

So throw it off. It is very liberating to celebrate your individualism. Many of us long to do it. But, there is a big BUT. You have to do it with style and confidence. If you want to portray the message that you don't care (within healthy social parameters) for fitting in, your whole being should reflect that. You have to stand tall in your uniqueness.

So, the message I got today was to not ask for permission (from who again???), but to go out there and do it. And I'm adding....."but do it with charisma, courage and guts!" If you're going to kick ass, kick ass in style!

PS - you want to share stories of how-to, let me know, happy to share experiences.

Love and light,

Celeste

Balance

The whole universe adheres to natural laws of balance. Every manmade structure needs balance. Every yoga class always has a few balance asanas (poses) in it. Everything we know has at least two sides - day and night, summer and winter, up and down, even good and evil. So why do we as humans often think we can defy this? Often ignoring or not even acknowledging the concept of balance in our lives. Someone told me this morning it has been 13 years since they've taken a holiday. The other day I heard about someone driving for 6 hours straight, not taking their foot off the pedal once. I see people eating too much at one sitting in restaurants. I know of people who either never socialize, or always socialize. At one stage I always wore black.

Now obviously it is admirable and possibly empowering to do something that requires focus and determination for a prolonged period of time. To be able to complete a sporting endurance event, for example. To focus and complete a task brings enormous satisfaction. And is required! And of course we all indulge ever so often, whatever the indulgence may be! And that is okay.

What may not be okay is if we don't realize an imbalance, or worse, when we realize it and we are unable to do something about it. We know it - too much is not a good thing.

And often it is not because we don't know that our lives are out of whack. Take for instance balance in our relationships. People often they know they do not allow themselves (or their partner) sufficient time, in lieu of work, kids, outside demands. They consciously know of an imbalance but are incapable of addressing it as their lives are just "too crazy". Or they say they don't read enough, or spend too much time on social media, or spend too much money, however they define "too much" or "not enough".

We can address the need-to's, ought-to's, shoulds and shouldn'ts. These are symptoms of our views and blueprints, and often signals of a deeper cause. But let's start with a slightly simpler way to create more balance.

Take a look at all the areas of your life as objectively as possible and check for any imbalances. Now....

Ask yourself WHY instead of HOW

Yes, the HOW might be important, but don't negate the reason for understanding why you do something. And seek the reason within yourself, not outside. The person who has not taken a holiday for 13 years has most likely not done it because of a boss, money, outside pressure or because they didn't get to the HOW'S. The perpetual over-eater is doing so because of some underlying reason, not because they don't know HOW to stop.

Once we know the real why, we can address it. What we THINK is the issue, rarely is. It is always the pattern, not the problem.

Start small

Don't try to change everything at once. Identifying all areas to address may highlight a pattern of behaviour, and that is all you need to start. Breaking the pattern is the next step.

Get outside perspective

A coach can not only help us see a pattern more clearly, but can guide us to identify blocks that may prevent us from moving forward, and support us to break the pattern. They can also hold us accountable, which is often what we need to prevent us from falling back into a pattern. Get yourself a life coach.

Become more self-aware

Notice when you are beginning to get out of alignment in any area. We often don't see the needle on the scale creeping up before it is "too late". People from failed marriages often say.... if only I'd known, or did/didn't..." Doing this does not take time. Learn to notice your emotions in any given situations as they are barometers or warning signals. Learn to pay attention to your own body. Take time before you react so you notice your emotions, thoughts and physical reactions.

Journal

Even if you enter one line a day, it is a start. Learn, understand and manage your life. Now look back onto it and reflect – what are the entries about?

Be grateful

Cultivate a habit of being grateful for everything. The beauty if this is that it automatically brings a sense of perspective. And ultimately, balance.

Then, take action…..we’ll talk about that next time.

Love and light,

Celeste

Abandon your past??

Are you courageous enough to abandon your past? Many of us have trouble leaving behind the scars of a past that was challenging, dark or sad. But that's a topic for another day...plenty of "let go" affirmations focus on that one. But can you abandon a past that was successful.

Huh? Why abandon a past that was successful?

Because that's how you grow!

Abandon is a strong word. Soften it if you like, but be firm. If you want to move forward, you need to move your whole body in the same direction - forward. Both legs, both arms, head, and eyes in front of you. Oh, absolutely smell the roses on the way, bask in tour glories, relax and saviour the memories, but move forward.

A lot of us stay stuck in our heads. We call it memories, treasures, etc. but in reality the same thought patterns revolve over and over the same things, and before we know it, we are stuck. Sadly stuck.

I once had a friend who always used to say "better a has-been than a never-been". I believe that statement can be taken totally out of context. I have more respect for the person who keeps on trying after failing again and again (as long as they keep on tying though!) - who some may dismiss as a "never-been", - than I have for the person who keeps on blowing their trumpet about an "achievement" they had years ago. Success is relative. Who was it who said "you're only as good as your last success"? <Substitute success with game, performance, run, book...>

Notice I used the word courageous in the opening line. Because it really is! So take credit if you succeed!

Love and light,

Celeste